May 20, 2018

Creating Your Emotional Generator

One of my clients shared with me how after being without electricity over the past week she was determined to become self-sufficient.  She was going to buy a generator.  She felt good taking care of herself by preparing for another power outage.  I thought about her relationship with her partner and how she would benefit by also learning how to be self-sufficient in this area.

So what would it look like to have your own ’emotional generator?”  Here are a few suggestions on how this would look:
1. You don’t make your partner responsible for your feelings.  You take personal responsibility for either causing your feelings or personal responsibility for managing your feelings.
2. You create inner safety rather than relying on your partner to make it safe enough for you to share your feelings and take loving actions for yourself
3.  You have access to your own source of strength, truth and wisdom.  This could be your  intuition/gut feeling, a higher part of yourself, a connection to your spirituality, whatever helps you know what is in your highest good.
4.  You are able to move into compassion for yourself rather than judgment.
5. You accept your partner rather than needing to change him/her
6.  You are willing to feel all your feelings rather than avoid them.

These are just a few ways to take control of what you ultimately only have power over: yourself.